pinkdrinks

i'm back!

2006-01-13T02:52:38Z

hey, i don't know if anyone still reads my livejournal, seeing that i haven't written anything in MONTHS! but anyways, i've been sick these past several days and i've just been vegging out in front of the computer since i can't seem to concentrate on studying. i had forgotten about livejournal and i signed on and read all my previous posts and it was awesome! i had forgotten about all of those good times! so i missed having a "diary" per se. so i'm going to try and update as often as i can.. and hopefully when i look back at this in a few months i'll be pleased. :)

so here's an update on where my life is right now:

i'm in my second semester of optometry school. i never thought it would be this hard. i don't do anything but go to school and study. i stay at the library in school till soooo long, so i'm trying to enjoy the beginning of the semester since there aren't any exams so early. but i've been sick since monday and nothing seems to help. going to school sick and trying to concentrate and study is becoming a difficult task to me.

so on tuesday i had OTM lab (optometric theory and methods) and we used this new machine called the slit lap or biomicroscope (it's basically a microscope so that i can get a really close look at ur eye!) IT'S AMAZING!!! it was sooo cool. i have never seen anything so cool in my life! the iris (color part of ur eye) looks completely different under a microscope!! it's not even the same color!! lab on tuesday totally reaffirmed my decision of optometry.. i fell in love with the eye all over again. the eye looks so simple... and you don't have to DO anything to actually see. you just open your eyes and you see. so simple but it's incredibly complicated, but also incredibly interesting!

about my love life... i'm still with jesus. it's been about 7 months so far. we just got over a nasty fight. our 2nd fight ever.. but it was bad. it seems like we hardly ever fight, but when we do... it's bad. i don't know whats worse. but i've learned that i don't know how to fight and neither does he. both of us just keep quiet when something bothers us, and what could have been solved in 10 minutes ends up building up and then blowing up into something huge. and i think what made the fight even worse is that it was over the holidays.. from christmas leading into new years. but we're good now, trying to get back to normal. he's in school now and so am i so we see each other like once a week - and i'm happy with that. no complaints. tomorrow we're going to houston's with my parents to celebrate my dad paying off our house. ha! i love free meals! now that i'm living on my own, i take advantage of all the good and free food i can get!

ok it's time to hit the books for an hour or so. bye!

pinkdrinks @ 2005-04-16T21:09:00

2005-04-17T01:09:23Z

i got accepted to NOVA! optometry school here i come!!! :)

pinkdrinks @ 2005-03-21T21:30:00

2005-03-22T02:31:41Z

i got an interview at nova for optometry school on april 11!!!!!! wooohoo..... i can't believe it!!! i'm soooo happy! :)

pinkdrinks @ 2005-03-14T19:43:00

2005-03-15T00:48:20Z

here are some pics from the super awesome juanes concert!!!

this is the arena before the concert...

this is the concert!!

this is jesus and i... :)

great times.. :)

pinkdrinks @ 2005-03-14T19:00:00

2005-03-15T00:00:37Z

why can't i post pictures?? only the link shows up?? help!

pinkdrinks @ 2005-03-14T14:30:00

2005-03-14T19:48:46Z

taken from foxymartini

Lasts...

last cigarette: yesterday
last kiss: saturday night..early sunday morning
last good cry: hmm... can't remember
last movie seen: wicker park at the keys with jesus :)
last cuss word uttered: fuck

last beverage drank: water
last food consumed: bally's meal replacement bar

Last time showered: yesterday after i came back from the beach!
last shoes worn: chancletas
last cd played: juanes!
last annoyance: jesus... he keeps losing his aol connection and it's really annoying!!
last disappointment: saturday morning when i woke up and couldn't recall what happened the night before. :(
last soda drank: Sprite with bacardi razz ;)
last thing written: my research observations in my notebook at work
last words spoken: OK OK OK. YES I KNOW WHAT TO DO. - to my boss.

last IM: to Jonathan
last time amused: Sunday at the beach with Ren
last time wanting to die: never
last time in love: i think now.. but he doesnt know it!!
last time hugged: yesterday..by my grandma

I...

I LOVE: music, movies, shopping, jewelery, my friends, and hanging out with jesus
I HATE: majonnaise, potatoes
I FEAR: BEES, roaches, not getting into optometry school, car accidents

I HOPE: I passed my OAT's and get into optometry school, Jesus feels the same way about me
I FEEL: bored

I HIDE: mostly everything... not sure if thats good or bad!?
I DRIVE: very safely
I MISS: having no responsibilities, going to the grove when it was fun
I LEARNED: not to waste my time on certain people...

pinkdrinks @ 2005-03-11T14:14:00

2005-03-11T19:20:49Z

i changed my layout.... but now brad pitt is gone. :( no more eye candy.. don't worry he'll be back up soon! this is the fun stuff i do at work so it's all good. this and www.myspace.com and www.thefacebook.com and i just got invited to join www.hi5.com so that will probably be my latest addiction, although myspace is still #1. :)

tonite is the juanes concert!!! i'm so excited!!! can't wait! i'm so sneaking my camera in there and taking pictures of juanes' cool ass hair! lol

pinkdrinks @ 2005-03-08T23:44:00

2005-03-09T04:59:59Z

i just got home from the library... school sucks.. i have a really bad case of senioritis... i have 2 tests on thursday and a huge presentation for work that same day... they're all back to back to back... i don't know how i'm going to survive this week....

on another note, i chatted a little bit with sumimasen_kiyo online and that was cool. it was a short convo.. but still nice to catch up really quick! lol

so marcos just called me to ask me if i wanted to buy tickets to go to the juanes concert this friday. i already have floor tickets that i've had for like 3 months now!!! but i kind of felt bad... i know he likes juanes (i introduced him to it!) and i know he wants to go, but i'm going with jesus. i bought 2 tickets for myself b/c i really wanted to go but i had no one to go with.. and i really wanted floor tickets and i don't know anyone who would dish out the money to pay for floor - i'm sure as hell that marcos wouldn't... so i didn't even think of asking him. everyone i asked thought i was crazy so i just bought to tickets and figured i would find someone to go with!!! and i did.... jesus is going.. we did an exchange... i got his ticket and he's driving and paying for all my drinks that night. i would say thats fair enough. :) i can't wait!!! friday night will definitely make this stressful week worthwhile! :) :) :) :)

gotta get back to studying.. blah blah blah... studying and cramps don't mix - this should be illegal!!!!

ok i was trying to do an lj cut for these pics of juanes but i forgot how to do it.. no time to figur it out now so you'll just have to deal with looking at the pictures! :)

goodnight!!!

he's got the coolest hair ever!!!!

wow

2005-03-07T21:26:28Z

this weekend was amazing. i had the best time EVER! jesus invited me to go to the keys with his family. and when i mean his family.. i mean cousins, aunts, uncles, the entire family! they have trailers in calusa in key largo. super nice trailers i might add. we drove up friday evening just me and him and the rest of the family showed up saturday morning. even the dog went!! it was a weekend full of experiences!

friday night we get there and i rode bike for the first time in about 10 years.. but it is true what they say, you never forget how to ride a bike. we put on the music in my laptop and drank an entire bottle of captain morgan just talking shit on the rocking chairs. then we started watching the terminal. has anyone seen it? i fell asleep.. it was kind of slow and both of us just passed out watching it.

saturday we woke up and went to eat at ganim's restaurant. i refused to go to waffle house b/c it's super gross and dirty.. but ganim's wasn't that far behind. they put something in that food that makes you have to run to the bathroom less than an hour after you eat it! lol saturday was very adventurous... jesus wanted to take me fishing b/c i've never been. so we went to kmart, i got my fishing license and then we went to the gas station to fill up this 50 gallon tank to put gas in the 2 boats. we put it in his trunk and put $50.00 of gas in it. when the tank reached $50.00 we noticed that it had been spilling all over the car!!!! the gas had leaked and it was ALL over his trunk. we left the gas station super fast and drove to his place to see what we could do. i thought i was going to pass out. i mean, i like the smell of gas and everything but this was just too much. my head was out the window the entire ride home, which thank god was not that far. we get there and his dad and uncle help him take out the gas and transfer it to the boat and he had to clean his car and air it out and then it became too late to go fishing. :( we still went out on the boat but no fishing b/c we weren't going to catch anything. which is ok with me. he promised me we would go next time. so at least there's a next time!! :)
but i thought he was going to be PISSSED. when i saw that happen i was like.. oh boy... i'm going to see a side of him that i've never seen before. so i tried to help him out but give him plenty of space at the same time. i totally didn't know what to expect, but i expected the worst (according to past experiences with other guys). i was completely shocked with his reaction. he was mad.. but not what i expected at all. he cursed a few times and then that was it. then he joked about it. so that was good. i was very happy with his reaction and it just made me like him more. then we went out on the boat and when we got back we had rabbit for dinner. i had never had that but it was delicious! poor bunny, but it was great! tastes like chicken :) that night we slept at his cousin's trailer b/c they had an extra bed. his cousin is awesome.. she closed the little curtain so we could sleep longer and the light won't bother us and we would have more privacy. good stuff ;)

then sunday we woke up and went to the pool. we both passed out in the sun holding hands.. it was sooo cute!!! but i'm SUPER red!!! my face, my shoulders, my arms, my legs, my stomach.. you name it.. it's red!! ouch. painful. then we watched the movie 15 minutes. and had some tacos for lunch and for dinner his dad made mahi mahi. suuuper good mahi mahi. the best i've ever had. then we drove down at like 7pm and hung out at his house until about 9pm and then went home. it's funny how i got so used to having him there so fast. it was so weird getting out of the shower and not have him there waiting for me... or going to sleep without kissing him good night and waking up without a good morning kiss :( i can't wait for our next vacation!

what kind of bothers me is that i don't think he's my boyfriend... his family called me "the girlfriend" but he introduces me as his friend. i kind of don't want to bring it up b/c i like how we are. i don't think i need a 'title' to define our relationship. plus.. i know his first year of law school is difficult and he's giving 100% to that, but he knows i understand about school. but his first year is almost over, so i can wait 2 months. but also, he knows i applied out of state for optometry schools and he knows that i want to move. so i think that plays a major role in the definition of our relationship. i don't want to start something to have it end in 3 months b/c i'm moving! so i guess it also depends on what schools accept me and where i decide to go to school. but i get along with him so well and we have so much fun together and we really like each other. i've never felt this way about anyone before. conversation just flows so well with him and there's never a dull moment. but what if i get accpeted in NY and at NOVA!?! what do i do? i've always wanted to move out of FL and go to school.... but now i'm having second thoughts. is it worth the relationship to stay in Ft. Lauderdale and go to NOVA? or should i take the risk of losing him and move to NY? it's so complicated.. i don't want to think about it right now. i guess i'll cross that bridge when i get there.

ok it's time to leave work now and go study my ass of for my 3 tests and 1 presentation this week. STRESS MODE HAS KICKED IN!!!!!!

♥ for the nice girls... ♥

2005-02-18T22:26:00Z

it's long... but i like it

This is my tribute to the nice girls. To the nice girls who are overlooked, who become friends and nothing more, who spend hours fixating upon their looks and their personalities and their actions because it must be that they are doing something wrong. This is for the girls who don’t give it up on the first date, who don’t want to play mind games, who provide a comforting hug and a supportive audience for a story they’ve heard a thousand times. This is for the girls who understand that they aren’t perfect and that the guys they’re interested in aren’t either. This is for the girls who flirt and laugh and worry and obsess over the slightest glance, whisper, touch, because somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe… maybe this time he’ll have understood.

This is a homage to the girls who laugh loud and often, who are comfortable in skirts and sweats and combat boots, who are more than they should for guys who don’t deserve their attention. This is for those girls who have been in the trenches, who have watched other girls time and time again fake up and make up and fuck up the guys in their lives without saying a word. This is for the girls who have been there from the beginning and have heard the trite words of advice, from "there are plenty of fish in the sea" to "time heals all wounds".

This is to honor those girls who know that the guys are just as scared as they are, who know that they deserve better, who are seeking to find it.

This is for girls who have never been in love, but know that it’s an experience that they don’t want to miss out on. For the girls who have sought a night with friends and been greeted by a night of catcalling, rude comments, and explicit invitations that they’d rather not have experienced. This is for the girls who have spent their weekends sitting on the sidelines of a beer pong tournament or a case race, or playing Florence Nightingale for a vomiting guy friend or a comatose crush, who have received a drunk phone call just before dawn from someone who doesn’t care enough to invite them over but is still willing to pass out in their bed.

This is for the girls who have left sad song lyrics in their away messages, who have tried to make someone understand through a subliminally appealing profile, who have time and time again dropped their male friend hint after hint only to watch him chase after the first blonde girl in a skirt. This is for the girls who have been told that they’re too good or too smart or too pretty, who have been given compliments as a way of breaking off a relationship, who have ever been told they are only wanted as a friend.

This one’s for the girls who you can take home to mom, but won’t because it’s easier to sleep with a whore than foster a relationship. This is for the girls who have been led on by words and kisses and touches, all of which were either only true for the moment, or never real to begin with. This is for the girls who have allowed a guy into their head and heart and bed, only to discover that he’s just not ready, he’s just not over her, he’s just not looking to be tied down. This is for the girls who believe the excused because it’s easier to believe that it’s not that they don’t want you, it’s that they don’t want anyone. This is for the girls who have had their hearts broken and their hopes dashed by someone to cavalier to have cared in the first place.

This is for the nights spent dissecting every word and syllable and inflection in his speech, for the nights when you’ve returned home alone, for the nights when you’ve returned home alone, for the nights when you’ve seen from across the room him leaning a little too close, or standing a little to near, or talking a little too softly to the girl he’s with to be a random hookup. This is for the girls who have endured party after party in his presence, finally having realized that it wasn’t that he didn’t want a relationship… it was that he didn’t want you.

I honor you for the night his dog died or his grandmother died or his little brother crashed his car and you held him, thinking that if you only comforted him just right, or said the right words, or rubbed his back in the right way then perhaps he’d realize what it was that he already had. This is for the night you realized that it would never happen, and the sunrise you saw the next morning after failing to sleep.

This is for the "I really like you, so let’s be friends" comment after you read more into a situation than he ever intended. This is for never realizing that when you choose friends, you seldom choose those which make you cry yourself to sleep. This is for the hugs you’ve received from your female friend, for the nights they’ve reassured you that you are beautiful and intelligent and amazing and loyal and truly worthy of a great guy. This is for the despair you felt as you sat in the aftermath of your tears, knowing that that night the only companionship you’d have was with a pillow and your teddy bear. This is for the girls who have been used and abused, who have endured what he was giving because at least he was giving something. This is for the stupidity of the nights we’ve believed that something was better than nothing, though his something was nothing we’d have ever wanted. This is for the girls who have been satisfied with too little and who have learned never to expect anything more. This is for the girls who don’t think that they deserve more, because they’ve been conditioned for so long to accept the scraps thrown to them by guys.

This is what I don’t understand. Men sit and question and whine that girls are only attracted to the mean guys, the guys who berate them and belittle them and don’t appreciate them and don’t want them; who use them for sex and think of little else than when their next conquest will be made. Men complain that they never meet nice girls, girls who are genuinely interested and compelling, who are intelligent and sweet and smart and beautiful. Men despair that no good woman wants to share in their lives, that girls play mind games, that girls love to keep them hanging.

Yet men, I ask you: were you to meet one of these genuinely interested, thrillingly compelling, interesting and intelligent and sweet and beautiful and smart girls, were you to give her your number and wait for her to call… and if you were to receive a call from her the next day and she, in her truthful, loyal, intelligent and straightforward nice girl fashion, were to tell you that she finds you intriguing and attractive and interesting and wroth her time and perhaps material from which she could fashion a boyfriend, would you or would you not immediately call your friends to tell them of the ‘stalker chic’ you’d met the night prior, who call you and wore her heart on her sleeve and told you the truth?

And would you, or would you not, refuse to make plans with her, speak with her, see her again, and once more again return t the bar or club or some party scene and search for this ‘nice girl’ who you just cannot seem to find? Because there lies the truth guys: we nice girls are everywhere. But you’re not looking for a nice girl. You’re not looking for someone genuinely interested in your intramural basketball game, or your anatomy midterm grade, or that argument you keep having with your father. You’re looking for a quick fix, a night when you can pretend to have a connection with another human being which is just as disposable as the condom you were using during it.

So don’t say you’re on the lookout for nice girls, guys, when you pass us up on every step you take. Sometimes we go undercover, sometimes we go in disguise, sometimes when that girl in low cut shirt or the too tight miniskirt won’t answer your catcalls, sometimes you’re looking at a nice girl in whore’s clothing. We might say we like the attention, we might blush and giggle and turn back to our friends, but we’re all thinking the same thing: "This isn’t me. Tomorrow morning, I’ll be wearing a tee-shirt and flannel shorts, I’ll have slept alone and I’ll be making my hung over best friend breakfast. See through the disguise. See me." You never do. Why? Because you only see the exterior, you only see the slutty girl who welcomes those advances. You don’t want the nice girl, so don’t say you’re looking for a relationship. Relationships take time and energy and intent, three things we’re willing to extend, but in return, we’re looking for compassion and loyalty and trust, three things you never seem willing to express.

Maybe the nice guys finish last, but in the race they’re running they’re chasing after the whores and the sluts and the easy targets. The nice girls are waiting at the finish line with water and towels and a congratulatory hug (and yes, if she’s a nice girl and she likes you, the sweatiness probably won’t matter), hoping that maybe you’ll realize that they’re the ones that you want at the end of that silly race.

So maybe it won’t last forever. Maybe some of those guys in that race will turn in their running shoes and make their way to the concession stand where we’re waiting; however, until that happens, we still have each other, that silly race to watch, and all the chocolate we can eat… because what’s a concession stand at a race without some chocolate?

a survey..

2005-02-17T04:21:45Z

courtesty of foxymartini ....

Fill out and return/ REPOST IT

1. Boyfriend/girlfriend: nope
2. Crush: definitely = jesus!!!
3. Do you love anyone right now: no... but i could
4. Have you ever been in love: yes
5. Ever had sex: yes
6. How many hearts have you broken: 3 - my friends call me a heartbreaker lol

7. How many people broke your heart: not as many as i've broken
8. So what's your significant other like: don't have one =(
9. Do you go more by looks or personality: personality

10. Ever kiss a friend: yea.. on new years
11. Are you still friends: yea
12. How about weed: yup
13. Acid: nope
14. Ecstasy: yup
15. Heroin, anything else: do xany bars count?
16. Are you a sissy who drinks Mike's Hard Lemonade and wine coolers: hell no!!!
17. Prefer beer or liquor: LIQUOR all the way... i love my captain!!!
18. Last time you got some: 30 minutes ago. ;)

WOULD YOU EVER
19. bungee jump: i'm dying to!
2o. Skydive: jesus and i are going once he finishes his first year of law school and i graduate.. which is SOON!!!
21. Swim with dolphins: aawww.. of course i would!
22. scuba dive: i'm certified thank you very much =)
23. Go rock climbing: sure.. but on what mountains?
24. Change your religion: nah
25. Turn your back on your friends for personal gain: no way
26. Steal a friend's boyfriend/girlfriend: no
27. Lie to the police: if it can get me out of trouble i would

28. Run from the police: no. im too chicken
29. Speed away from the police: no. i dont want to go to jail!

3o. Walk up to a total stranger and kiss them: haha.. we had to do this on a scavenger hunt.. but i didnt.. too embarrassing
31. Be an exotic dancer: nope

32. Streak: not if its only me!

FRIENDS
34. Who have you known the longest: i would proably have to say elisa - since we were 4 years old baby!!

35. Wish you talked to more than you do: my guy friends chuch and jonathan... they're always so busy with work

36. How many friends do you think you have: i have many... they don't call me a social butterfly for nothing

37. How many do you actually hang out with: almost every weekend -- maggie, paco, cristi, danny, cristy, renee, maritza, elisa, laura, chuchi, jonathan, and jesus

39. Ever lose a good friend because you took it to the next level: yup

HAVE YOU EVER
4o. Flashed someone: yes
41. Told a person you liked how you felt: i never did.. until i met jesus

42. Gotten really REALLY wasted: lol.. story of my life

43. Skateboarded: nah
44. Skinny dipped: yea lol
45. Stolen anything from a store: a scrunchi when i was like 9

46. Kissed someone of the same sex: nope
47. Been to a concert: i'm a concert whore!!! next one is juanes march 11 =)
48. Been to another country: yup - spain, italy, germany, portugal

49. Talked back to an adult: yup

5o. Given money to some homeless person: yes
51. Tried to kill yourself: nope
52. Cried to get out of trouble: yea.. i can cry on command!
53. Kissed a friend's brother/sister: i kissed my cousins friend.

THE LAST THING
54. You ate: rice with carne puerco, a banana, and salad at jesus' house :)
55. You drank: water
56. The last place you went: jesus' house and the gym before that
57. Last thing you bought: lunch at pollo tropical at school

58. Last person you saw: my mom when i got home from jesus' house

59. Last person you talked to online: mike

6o. Last person you hugged: jesus

61. Last song you heard: juanes
63. Do the voices talk only to you: i dont hear voices yo
64. Are you straight: straight as an arrow

65. Are you short: i think i am

66. Do you own a hot pink shirt: i own a hot pink EVERYTHING!
67. Do you like Marilyn Manson: ha-pp-y b-i-rth-daaayyyy mr. president.... she's ok
68. Did you ever touch someone else's no-no spot: umm.yea

69. Do you shop at Hot Topic: nope

7o. Do you remember your dreams: usually
71. Can people read you like a book: yea.. it's one of my defaults.. im a bad bad liar/faker
72. Do you talk alot: yea.. especially when i'm DRUNK! lol

73. Are you afraid of clowns: no
74. Can you drive: yes
75. Are you an only child: yes i'm a spoiled brat!

pinkdrinks @ 2005-02-15T11:13:00

2005-02-15T16:54:16Z

valentine's day this year wasn't Out Of this wOrld... but i still had a great time. i went to wOrk... ate a lOt of chOcOlate... then went to the gym where i was extremely proud of myself for getting stronger! i had to add weights to everything b/c it was getting too easy. wOw.. it's amazing.. just a week ago i couldn't lift shit... i'm really amazed at my capabilities. =)

before going to the gym, jesus passed by my house to pick up my laptOp (his is broken). i met up with him at the library after the gym... and that was my valentine's day. valentine's day at the library.. it sure was empty. i didn't get a gift and all i did was make him cOOkies... but regardless i still had a great time. it's weird. i don't need anything from him. just his company is fine with me.. even if it is at the library. isn't that weird? i mean.. before i really needed gifts and to gO Out to fancy shmancy dinner.. but this is so different. i don't even want that stuff. i guess it's b/c i know he cant since he's really busy with his school work - and i'm a dork b/c thats what i find most attractive lol. anyways.....i hope everyone had a great valentine's day... sumimasen_kiyo congrats on the engagement!!! foxymartini did you take my advice??? did any kinky stuff go on last night?! lOl!!! plnk_star thanks for showing me how to make my LJ pretty!!!!

so i'm at work right now during my break and my coworker received a PUPPY from her bOyfriend yesterday!!! it's taking a nap on my lap while they work :) it's the most adorable thing ever!!! i want a puppy!!!

♥ happy valentine's day ♥

2005-02-14T20:56:12Z

hOpe everyOne is having a great valentine's day!!!

you make me wanna lala....

2005-02-01T06:31:07Z

i had such a great weekend.. things with jesus and i are working out great. he's not my boyfriend but i really like our friendship. saturday i was at the library since about 2:30pm and by 7pm i was going crazy. i studied for 4.5 hours straight without taking a break or daydreaming or anything. i was actually very proud of myself.. i got a lot done. so i go downstairs to take a break and i called jesus to see what he was up to. he says he doesnt feel like doing school work and that he was going to go pick me up at the library and we were gonna go somewhere. woo hoo!!! so we go to some little columbian neighborhood bar where we only meant to have a drink, but we made friends with the bartender, had some interesting conversations, and 1 drink led to 2 which led to 3 which led to 4. sheeeeesh. then we go to the movies. since when did dolphin mall become so GHETTO!!! a fight broke out as soon as we got there and there was this ghetto girl saying the craziest things.. "i'll fuck that nigga up bro. you know i will!" she could not have been older than 18 years old. WHEN I HAVE CHILDREN THEY ARE NOT LEAVING THE HOUSE!!!! have you seen how those girls dress in dolphin mall... i mean, it's not summer and i know it's not winter in miami but at least put pants on!!! don't wear that itsy bitsy skirt when its kinda chilly outside. whats wrong with parents these days? i dont think my mother would let me leave the house like that now!!! so back to the me and jesus part :) .... after the fight drama we went and had a tequila shot and a rum runner at that daiquiri place. yuuum. i would have actually preferred if the tequila was chilled, but room temperature was still good. we saw meet the fockers for the second time. that movie is really funny on a few drinks! so that was my fun saturday date. :) hopefully he'll want me to be his valentine and we can have another fun saturday date. i'll keep ya posted...

my oat (optometry admissions test) is on saturday!!!! i'm not nervous yet but im kind of starting to freak out that i don't really remember much chemistry and especially physics. everything else is a piece of cake. this test is NOT that hard at all.. but you can't just wing it. i swear if i don't do well on this test and don't get into any optometry test i will cry and i will feel extremely stupid. and then i won't know what else to do with my life. pharmacy maybe? or i don't know. i think med school is out of the picture now.. or is it? i'm so undecisive. when will i make up my mind with what i want to do!!! i know it's health related thats for sure.. but WHAT? decisions decisions.

so i'm taking these fat burners i bought at the gym and i take one a day - i'm suppossed to take 2 but i don't see how as 1 keeps me up forever. i really like them b/c if it weren't for these i wouldn't be up right now and i wouldnt have gotten as much studying done as i did tonite. i would have probably watched tv and just gone to sleep. or is it the sense of procrastination settling in that i only have 4 days left!! well it could be a lot of things, but at least i'm burning fat!!

well i have to go force myself to sleep... got class early tomorrow.

pinkdrinks @ 2005-01-26T15:59:00

2005-01-26T21:10:18Z

i'm so tired. we had a party at work today.. cupcakes and icecream. sooo good. i made the cupcakes. well, originally i had made a cake and then i was making cupcakes (normal ones and star shaped) for the house and to give to jesus. :) the cake got stuck to the pan and wouldn't come out. we had to force it out and that just made a huge mess. the cake was lost. THANK GOD i made extra cupcakes and star cake things. so i give jesus my mushed up cake. that was his dinner. poor guy. he was so hungry i dont think he cared what he was eating! so my mom set aside the cupcakes and the star cakes last night for me to take to work today. i get to the kitchen in the morning and the 9 little cupcakes are fine but the star cakes are FULL OF ANTS!!! what is going on here! i felt like i just wasted my time yesterday baking for a coworker when i could (should) have been studying. sucks.

studying sucks. every day that goes by i want to study less and less. by the time i sit down to study i'm sooo tired. i dont know whats wrong with me. no motivation. don't know why!!!! i really really really want to pass this test. i don't want to wait another year in order to get into grad school!!!

after work im going to the gym to work out with my personal trainer Andy. He's cool. we get along and that's good b/c i look forward to going to the gym and hanging out with him. he's 19...so don't think anything sumimasen_kiyo. he makes me laugh and get a really great workout so i enjoy working out with him!!! :)

im going on a cruise for spring break and that is the reason why i am a health nut all of a sudden (well, today was a birthday exception). gotta look good in a bikini by march!!!!

i have to peeeeee

wow...

2005-01-19T02:25:18Z

it's been a while since i've posted something meaningful on this thing. problem is that i think it's annoying updating on livejournal without a client and i haven't downloaded the client on my new computer yet. i forgot which one i had and which ones are good or bad... SOMEONE TELL ME PLEASE!!!!

school started and i'm already stressing out. i'm only stressing out b/c i have my oat's (optometry admissions test) on feb 5. thats about 3 weeks away!!! i really really really want to excel in these b/c 1. i've been shadowing an optometrist and i really like the study of the eye. i can definitely see myself doing that and that gets me excited! 2. i want to get out of my house already! i want to live somewhere else other than miami! i know what everyone says.. be glad you're home b/c when you're living on your own you'll miss your mommy and daddy. yadda yadda yadda. i won't miss them. i want to explore the world!!!!!!!!

i finally finished my stats homework. it only took me about 2 hours to do it!!!! but at least i understand it.. thats a first!

i ran into my friend jesus at the library on sunday. he's so cute. i like him. but i can't. no relationships no relationships. even though we've already talked about that and we decided to remain friends and just grow closer as friends without the mushy relationship stuff. and fine. i agree with that b/c if i do move away, it would be so much easier without a boyfriend. no one to miss or to call every single freaking day. plus if i had a boyfriend i just might consider staying in ft. lauderdale at nova which i really dont want to unless i dont get accepted anywhere else! but i want a valentine!!! i want him to be my valentine but he's ALWAYS studying since he's in law school. and the fact that valentine's is on a monday doesnt really help my cause much. i don't know if he would ask me to be his valentine... but do you think it would be ok to ask him to be my valentine?? my problem is not so much the question.. but the answer. i don't know if i can deal with rejection so that is what keeps me from asking him. i don't know how well i would handle a NO I DONT WANT TO BE YOUR VALENTINE TESSIE! how do you do it guys!?!??!

well, it's time for me to continue studying for this damn test and maybe watch some mtv. :)

goodnight!

thanks for the quiz sean!

2005-01-18T05:03:38Z

You scored as Prep/Jock/Cheerleader.

</td>

Prep/Jock/Cheerleader

56%

Punk/Rebel

44%

Ghetto gangsta

38%

Goth

25%

Stoner

19%

Geek

19%

Drama nerd

Loner

What's Your High School Stereotype?
created with QuizFarm.com

what i want!!!!

2005-01-18T04:56:50Z

Tell her you think shes cool.
Tell her why you think shes so cool.
Smell her hair.
Talk to her in movie theatres.
Pick her up and pretend youre going to throw her in the river;
shell scream and fight you but secretly, she`ll love it.
Hold her hand and skip.
Hold her hand and run.
Just hold her hand.
Pick flowers from other peoples gardens and give them to her.
Tell her she's pretty.
Let her pay if she wants to.
Introduce her to your friends as The coolest girl you know.
Sit in the park and talk to her.
JUST TALK TO HER.
Take her to the library
TAKE HER ANYWHERE.
Tell her dirty jokes.
TELL HER HAPPY STORIES.
TELL HER SAD STORIES.
TELL HER YOUR STORIES.
TELL HER ANYTHING
Tell her stupid jokes.
Write poems about her.
Just walk with her.
Throw pebbles at her window
When she starts swearing at you,... tell her you love her.
Take her to shows of bands shes never heard of.
Hold her hand in the mosh pit.
Let her fall asleep in your arms.
Call her.
Call her back if she calls you.
Sing to her, no matter how bad you are.
Carve your names into a tree.
Get her mad, then kiss her.
Give her piggy-back rides.
Go see her band play even if they really suck, and tell her they were great.
Give her space if she needs it.
Push her on swings.
Stay up with her all night when shes sick.
Make up pet names for her, but cool ones, not sappy ones.
Teach her guitar.
Lend her your cds.
Write on her.
WRITE ABOUT HER.
Make her mixtapes.
Write her letters.
Take her to cool shops, and let her take you to even cooler ones.
Just hang out with her.
Listen to all the bands she mentions.
Dont tell her that her favorite bands suck.
When shes sad, hang out with her or stay on the phone with her, even if shes not saying anything.
Buy her ice cream.
Let her take all the photos of you she wants.
Look into her eyes.
Slow dance with her,even if the music is fast.
TELL HER A SECRET.
Kiss her in the rain...
JUST KISS HER.
TRUST HER.
LOVE HER.
BE YOURSELF AROUND HER.
CHERISH HER . . . and
when you fall in love with her tell her.

i feel cheated

2004-12-11T18:38:58Z

ok. yes i know.. i'm psycho. you don't need to tell me this. but my friend had me check alex's email again (i swear it wasnt me!). he wanted to see the naked pics of cristy.. so i signed in to show them to him and along with the pictures, i found this email that he wrote to himself. looks like someone needs a livejournal account... now i truly and absolutely despise him. but i have a question.. is this really him writing or is it a joke b/c he suspects i'm reading his email. to me... it seems real, just b/c i can totally picture everything happening and i told him once that i hope the sex with cristy is good and he had a very strange reaction to my comment. but i dont know! check it out...

tonight i feel like writiing this. i dont know whwtA IT IS BUT IT IS WHTA I FEEL LIKE WRITING., FIRST AND FOREMOST IM A FUCKING IDOIT, LIKE REALLY, I NEVER GOING TO LAW SCHOOL, EVEN IF I WERE SMART ENOUGHT WHICH I PROB AM I AM A HUGE IDIOT. I TRY TO REASON EVERYTHING OUT BUT MY REASON DOESNT WORK, ATLEAST IN THE SITUATIONS IN WHICH I NEED IT THE MOST. NEXT FEELINGS ARE A PIECE OF SHIT. MAN MY FEELINGS ARE ALWAYS WRONG AND MY REASON IS ALWAYS RIGHT. IF I WOULD JUST LISTEN TO MY REASON EVERYTHING WOULD GO GREAT FOR ME. I WAS HAPPY. IT WASNT A LONG TIME BUT I WAS HAPPY. WHEN I WENT OUT WITH ZUNY I WAS SOOOO HAPPY IT WAS SO UNEXPLAINABLE, BUT SOMEHOW I HAD AN ILLSION THAT WAS HAPPY. WHICH GOES TO PROVE THAT YOUR MIND IS THE MOST POWERFUL THING, IT GUIDES EVERYTHING. EVEN IF YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT TO DO IT THROWS IN THIS THAT FEELING FACTOR AND IT FUCKS YOU UP. MAY BE TH E PPL THAT HAVE BECOME SUCCESS FUL REALLY HAVE LEARNED TO IGONRE FEELING AND SEE IT AS A WEAKNESS. I REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS THAT ARE GOING THUR MY MIND RIGHT NOW. FIRST AND FORMOST I AM DRUNK. AND I WAS THINKING OF A GREAT POINT BUT BC OF MY GRAMMER I FORGOT. MAN I DONT KNOW, THERE ARE SO MANY POSSIBLITIES FOR ME. I REALLY COULD DO A LOT, BUT THE QUESTION IS COULD I DO IT WITH CRISTY? WITHOUT TESSIE? THESE TWO WOMEN HAVE BEEEN THERE WITH ME THUR A LOT, EACH IN THERE OWN WAY. I HAD FEELINGS FOR CRISTY I AM NOT DENIEIG THAT I DID. I CAN STILL REMEMBER WHEN I USED TO THINK ABOUT HOW IT WOULD BE IF CRISTY AND I FINALLY GOT TOGETHER. I LOVED EVERYTHING, THE WAY WE USED TO BE TOGETHER, THE WAY THAT HER AND I WERE ALWAYS DOING STUFF TOGETHER AND WE WERE ALWAYS HAPPY. THERE WERE THE TIMES THAT SHE WOULD BE A BITCH AND TREAT ME LIKE SHIT B.C SHE WAS HANGINGOUT WITH ANNETTE, BUT I TOOK IT, I KNEW THAT NO MATTER WHAT THEY HAD WHAT WE HAD WAS SO MUCH MORE SPECIAL. EVEN THE TIMES THAT SHE WOULD STILL LEAVE MY BY MYSELF AND GO TO LIKE A PARTY AT ALAVEREZS HOUSE I KNEW DEEP DOWN SHE FELT BAD THAT SHE DIDNT HANG OUT WITH ME, OR THOSE TIMES THAT THEY SAID WE LOOKED LIKE BROTHER AND SISTER SHE WOULD ACT ALL OFFENED BUT I KNEW DEEP DOWN THAT SHE WOULD ACT LIKE THAT SO I WOULDNT THINK SHE LIKE ME AND WE COULD STILL HAVE A CHANCE TOGETHER IF I DID SOMETHING ABOUT IT. AFTER A WHILE AFTER SHE DATED SO MANY GUYS AND SHE KEPT SAYING THAT I SHOULD FIND SOMEONE ELSE I FINALLY DID. I FOUND TESSIE. AND I LOVED TESSIE SOOOOO MUCH. LIKE ITS INCREDIBLE I NEVER THOUGHT SOME COULD FIND THE IMPERFECTIONS ABOUT A PERSON AND LOVE THEM NOT OVER FOR THERE GOOD QUAiltys but at the same time love them for the things that werent normal. i loved tessie to death and i ever wanted was to have tessie and cristy get along and in some werid way everything end happly ever after. thats not what happen, cristydecided that after i was with tessie i would make a great boyfriend. after the jew, david arango, jc, etc etc werent good enough then yea after i did what you told me what i thought you wanted, after i found someone else you come and your like you like me. i mean ok fine tessie toward the end had problems, b.c after the cruise, after i kissed you nothing felt the same again...cristy has a sort ofpower over me. in a sense cristy really the center of my world. even when i was tessie and i was in totally love with her, cristy always have a kinda of sort advantage. i never was able to put tessie beyond cristy, nor cristy past tessie. i dont know everything was great. but after cinco de mayo everything went wrong, i myself put the moves on cristy so it was my fault. but i did feel something between us which is the reason i did it. all this is super scary and i dont know what to do. i have had the worst yr every since this has happened. i keep telling myself that no matter how bad something gets in the long run eventually i will be happy and then it will be all worth it, but let me tell you right now, this is my lowest point even, tonight firday/saturday nov 20 somthing. i dont thats sayin a lot b.c ive been thru some shit in my life but i even handeld it better then than i did now. so yea thats how this shit is and im going to bed 45

so this concludes (if it's true) that alex cheated on me with cristy... ON THE CRUISE. I was on this cruise. and now that i think about it.. it was right in front of my face and i didnt see it. why am i so oblivious to everything? i trusted him so much that i never thought he would do anything with cristy (b/c shes UGLY AS HELL)... and i totally believed him that they were just best friends!!! i really do regret everything and every momet with him.. but i know better than that.... so i'm going to learn from this rather than hate him. so far i learned not to trust someone too much... i dont know what else i learned. i guess ill figure it out later when i have time. but i have no time to thik about this right now. i have finals. time to study...

too much to drink

2004-11-29T20:35:12Z

happy thanksgiving!!! i went to orlando and st. augustine for the weekend with my parents. i finally go to see cirque du soleil in orlando! it was soooo good. i loved it! hung out with my cousins for a bit... my cousin dyed his hair blue!! he's crazy. i ate soo much. everything was sooo delicious. my mom got really wasted. we were having apple martinis and she had 4 in like an hour!!! then she ate and passed out. she threw up and everything. it was really gross, but funny as hell lol. so i was designated driver for my parents. got lost going back to the hotel... it was great. then on saturday we went to st. augustine. the oldest u.s. city. it was raining all day so that sucked. we took a little tour of the city and did some wine tasting. that was exciting. saw the fountain of youth, flagler college, the oldest schoolhouse ever, and other old things lol. there's nothing to do there!!! not sure if i would go back. the drive home sucked ass. i had nothing to do. i slept the entire way home. i knew i should have taken my books.. but everytime i take my books on a roadtrip i never even open them so i didnt take them this time and i wish i did!!! lesson learned: always take your books with you everywhere! :)

so last night when i got home i went to my friend red's house. i love him! i think he's the best friend ever and he's so fun and i love his family! i got there and people were decorating the xmas tree while taking aguardiente shots. super gross shots but i took them down too! then red made me a vodka and cranberry.. but he made me a HUGE one! and i had 2 of those lol. we played taboo, hung out, talked shit. it was really fun. then it was 2am and i had to go home. i know its bad and if i get caught i wont be able to go to med school but i did a little of drinking and driving last night. his house is super close to mine and i dont know what happened. time really does fly when you're having fun. i know it's no excuse but i had no ride home. i would have stayed there except that i had my mom's car and i had to take it to her so she could go to work this morning! so yea. that was my interesting night. i don't remember much. but i have some interesting pictures of some people i dont even know!! i don't even remember taking pictures.. super weird. i remember talking shit about some people but i have no idea what i said!!!i hate when that happens... but it usually happens when i drink alot. w/e.. im used to it lol. and this morning my dad woke me up at 9:30 - the time my class starts! i didnt set my alarm last night - totally forgot about school! so yea. i didnt go to class today. again! i didnt go last wednesday either. i had to go with my dad to drop off my car at the dealer b/c the rotars are bad or w/e.. i dont know anything about cars. so then my dad dropped me off at school and i hung out at starbucks and drank coffee and sobered up a little bit until i had to go to work. now i'm sitting here doing NOTHING, eating a chocolate i bought from my boss' son. i love these school chocolates.. they have variety now! i remember when i used to sell them it was only milk chocolate. now its caramel, milk chocolate, or milk chocolate with crispy things in it. i didnt know which one to get so i got one of each! lol

so i didnt write it but last wednesday bozi called me. i was seriously making mac n cheese for lunch and he calls me that he's in the area and he wanted to know if i had lunch already. OF COURSE I DIDNT HAVE LUNCH YET! lol i made the mac n cheese and saved it for dinner. he picked me up in a bmw z4 convertible and we went to eat at casa paco. super good. i had to much fun. nothing happened but he was very flirty with me. either way it was very exciting to hang out with him again! but he looks different. hes not as hot as i thought he was! i dunno.... it was weird but still fun!

on another note, jesus called me on thanksgiving to say hi!! he's so cute! i really like him. hes going to be at the library tonite and so will i!!! :) we'll see what happens. anyways, my dad's picking me up now so i can go get my car!! i get my new computer tomorrow!!! i cant wait! super excited!!!

what a success!

2004-11-22T05:03:49Z

i had my marykay debut on saturday at my house and everything worked out really well! everyone was happy and fell in love with the satin hands products - which are AMAZING i might add. i got a lot of orders and a lot of bookings for facials. i'm really excited about it. so for all of you who have not visited my website.. go right now to www.marykay.com/tess221 and check it out!! i can wrap gifts and deliver them to whoever you want for christmas. i'm also capable of making giftbaskets! it's fun stuff :)

i'm exhausted so i'm off to bed... i have a lot to say but i'll do it tomorrow at work!!!!

pinkdrinks @ 2004-11-12T12:52:00

2004-11-12T18:20:02Z

BOZI JUST CALLED ME! :)
he just called to say hi and to see how i did on my mcats. when i told him i did bad he was like.. whats wrong with you? didn't you study?? i need a doctor. hurry up and go to med school!! aaaah.. i hate it when people make me feel stupid. anyways, he also told me that his baby is due more towards the end of the year and that he's going to noche buena at my house solo b/c his girlfriend (the pregnant one) has to work that night. she owns a jewelery store in downtown and she sells the most that day suppossedly. that kinda sucks doesnt it? to have to give up being with ur friends, family, and loved ones on christmas eve b/c it's the day you make the most money. i guess if you REALLY REALLY need it.. but personally i would not care. i would rather be with my family and friends (and bozi) than making money! well, i guess it's good that she's not going b/c i get to have him all to myself lol. but things are totally different now b/c 1. he has a girlfriend. although that never stopped us before.... and 2. SHE'S PREGNANT!! there's a baby!!
so what do i do!? what if he tries something on me again? what do i do? do i go with it? do i stop? i have to make the decision now b/c if i wait to make the decision when i'm drunk i know i won't care about the girlfriend or baby. i want to but i dont want to just b/c of the damn baby. i dont know what to dooooooo.

so anyways, last night i went on another date with this guy Eddy. (not the crush i have) we went to the improv with his friend and his girlfriend. can i tell you how i thought his friend was really hot! I don't think Eddy's my type though. he lives far as hell.... he DOESNT DRINK. let me say that again.. HE DOESNT DRINK. AT ALL. he drinks sprite. lol but i got him to have some of my 190 octane from fat tuesday last night and his friend was like.. holy shit i've NEVER seen you drink anything before!!! ... he dresses really nice, but he hasn't gone to school. he went straight from high school to working b/c he had to help out his mom. he's really nice and he's ok looking (except for that small gap b/w his teeth that really bothers me lol), but it's all this other stuff that makes him unattractive. the fact that he hasn't even ATTEMPTED going to college is very unattractive to me. he tells me school isn't for everyone. i think it is, so we had a little discussion about it yesterday and he told me why he didnt go to school and why he doesnt drink and it all leads back to his father who left his mother when he was 14 and he had to work to help out his mom and all this stuff. which i totally understand, but he's 25 and he doesn't have 1 credit in college. that's going to hurt him in the long run, i think. so yea. i dont see myself with this guy but i do have fun with him.. he's a cool person. but i just don't know what to tell him. we haven't kissed or anything.. so i guess i dont have to tell him anythign YET, right? lol ooh.. and he has a tattoo of a dragon on his right shoulder. i've never dated a guy with a tattoo before. i don't mind.. they're just not my thing you know. but fine he has a tattoo. but the first time we went out i asked him if he had any tattoo's and he told me no! i didn't lie to him about smoking and i know he doesnt like it.. i told him i smoke but im trying to quit (havent lit up in over a month :)except 1 day lol ) so he lied to me on the first date.. THEN he didn't even offer to pay for my drink at fat tuesday's last night. i wasn't going to ASK him to pay and he doesnt drink so it's weird. but he was standing right next to me and i was getting my money out to pay the bartender and he didn't even try to stop me. in the end, i don't think he passed the test. he's fired.

as far as alex... haven't talked to him. it's officially over b/w him and i. FINALLY lol

and jesus.. i like jesus. he's great. he's really busy though..he's in law school and always studying. now THAT is attractive to me. yes i know. im a nerd. just once.. ONCE i want to just go to the library with a guy i like and play footsies under the table lol!! so anyways, we talk like every other day and we're going out december 15.. thats the day of my last final. we already made plans. AND he's looking for a place to take salsa lessons so we can be salsa pro's by new years. :) once he starts spending time with me i KNOW i can put him under my spell and he'll fall deeply and madly in love with me. hee hee hee lol.

im at work. doing nothing. my boss hasnt even stopped by. i'm stuppossed to be inputting all these freaking papers in the computer and i really really hate it. i hate excel. it's boring and my eyes are hurting from doing the same thing over and over and over again. i guess ill get back to doing boring stuff. ciao ciao

i have a crush!!

2004-11-08T07:43:15Z

i have a crush and i just realized it TODAY. i know this guy Jesus and I met him b/c we went to spain together with FIU. i'm listed in www.myspace.com and so is he and he found me on it about 2 months ago so we've been talking online and we've talked twice on the phone. today im in the library studying and i see him and we talk for a little bit and he leaves to go home. when i get home i get online and he's online too.. so he ims me. :) he asked me if i wanted to be his study buddy and tells me im cute and hes sooo sweet! he told me he's going to call me when he gets out of school tomorrow so we can meet up in the library. yay! a library date! just what i've always wanted!!!! lol.. im such a nerd.

now im off to get my beauty sleep to look great tomorrow! lol

pinkdrinks @ 2004-11-05T15:01:00

2004-11-05T20:07:20Z

i am very very very frustrated. someone stole the lighter at work and i can't light the stupid bunsen burner to do my job. i called my boss and told him so maybe he could solve my problem or something and you know what he tells me? welll.. i dunno. look around and if u don't find it then i don't know. yea thanks. i looked around before i called you and i don't know what to do so thats why i called my boss!! but he doesn't know. so im not going to do anything. im bored as hell. booo

pinkdrinks @ 2004-10-25T17:52:00

2004-10-25T21:52:45Z

happy birthday to equus_sb